today at the bagel store
i was licking chunks
of cream cheese
off my fingers

and then the same
with the onion
and cucumber
and scotch salmon
which
incidentally
is much better
than
lox

i had a mouthful of glory
and my bagel
open,
unsandwiched
in front of me

my hands covered
with cream cheese
and the slices of salmon
i peeled apart with
my fingers

and then
he came up to me
and shoved a plastic knife in my hand
with a grin on his face
that screamed his
lifetime of
entitlement
to my joy
and a ritual of ignorance
believing
a man knows what is best
for my body

oh agony of insult
i do not need your plastic knife
for my messy bagel
i do not need your fleshy knife
to be unsandwiched

do not need
the dream you had last night
in which i shaved
my pussy
for you

do not need you to tell me
my pants are getting dirty
when i sit on the subway platform

haven’t you already decided
the heat zipped inside
me
is already dirty?

why then
should my insides
not match
my outsides?

what is it about your ancestry of ineptitude
that you beg
i keep my blood
and my dirt
and my raw
onions
and salmon
hidden
inside
my bagel?

that is
only
until
you take your knife
to spread
my legs

guess what? 
i haven’t needed a knife
for a bagel
in quite some time

actually

my girlfriend
prefers i
use my
fingers.